


but you and i (we'll be just fine)

by transgirluma (gayapplewhite)



Category: Descendants (Disney Movies)
Genre: Auradon is a Shithole, Bonding, Gen, Genderfluid Character, Genderfluid Lonnie Gives Me Life LBR Here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-05-20
Packaged: 2019-05-09 11:01:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14714798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gayapplewhite/pseuds/transgirluma
Summary: “lonnie squeezes his hand again. “we'll be blue someday, doug...”or; lonnie and doug have more in common than one would think.





	but you and i (we'll be just fine)

**Author's Note:**

> i thought of this idea of doug and lonnie bonding in the shower because i was thinking about the full names of descendants characters and how lonnie is lonnie rather than having, you know, an actually chinese name. and then i wrote this in like, an hour. this totally fits in with my doug fic, right after the bit where doug and henry have their first fight. anyways eventually i'll finish the jane fic and the second part of the gmw buffy au but that day is not today so enjoy this oneshot in the meantime instead. also if you want to hear any of my full name headcanons hmu @malicebertha on tumblr
> 
> please kudos and comment if you enjoyed; your comments mean the world to me!

“you're not a coward, douglas.” doug blinks at his oatmeal. only his family calls him douglas (and even then only when they're upset), and he’s fairly certain the voice isn't any of his family members, because henry still isn’t speaking to him, and everyone else is at home in auntie snow’s kingdom, and that's at least a day’s ride by normal standards, and accounting for how slow dwarven travel can be, it's around two or three, and there's no way henry could have spread the news that fast. doug looks up, and it isn't any of his family members. it's lonnie. he blinks again. this is early for her, he notes, and wonders what exactly she’s doing up this early. 

“what?” he says finally, because lonnie isn’t leaving, and it feels rude to not say anything.

lonnie pulls out the chair across from him and sits down, putting her water bottle down on the counter and stealing doug’s plum. he doesn't protest. if he's honest, he's not feeling very hungry right now anyways. “i heard what henry said to you,” lonnie says, tone stiff. 

“oh,” doug says. there is a long silence. lonnie takes a bite out of the plum and the juice dribbles down her chin. doug doesn’t know what to say. he doesn’t like to think about what henry said to him. he thinks on some level it’s because he knows that henry is right. 

“aziz told me,” lonnie finally says, and then, after taking a gulp of water, adds, “and it just — it just makes me so angry, what he said to you, because you're not a coward. you're just trying to fit in. we all are.” there’s a sort of fire in her eyes, and doug can sense that what henry has said must have hit some kind of nerve.

“yeah,” doug says eventually. he's still trying to figure out exactly what lonnie is doing up this early. usually only he and jane and occasionally jordan are up when breakfast opens. he finally notices the way the hair sticks to the back of her neck and the headphones looped around her neck and the workout clothes. oh. she was running, he thinks. that makes sense.

“did you know my name isn't actually lonnie?” she asks, pulling doug out of his thoughts. doug blinks.

“it's not?” he asks, confused, and she nods. 

“it’s lan ai,” she says. “a rather than o in the first part, and the second part is pronounced ‘eye’ instead of ‘e’. but people kept saying it wrong and eventually i just gave up on correcting them. it was easier,” she admits, shrugging, and she gives doug a meaningful look.

“that sucks,” doug says, and means it. he sympathizes with her. this is like her bracelets, he thinks, except she can’t just take them off. everything is a reminder. anytime anyone says her name, she’s reminded that this isn’t who she really is. he is lucky, he thinks. he can forget about his bracelets, forget about what he really truly is. (he doesn't, but he tries not to think about that part). “do you want me to call you — ” he pauses here, wanting to make sure he pronounces it right, “lan ai?”

she smiles. “lonnie's fine,” she says. “it's kind of like a nickname at this point.”

“okay,” doug says, and lonnie reaches across the table and squeezes his hand. 

“that's why i don't think you're a coward, doug,” she says. she laughs a little sourly and adds, “if i did, i'd be a hypocrite, because i'm doing the exact same thing. we're like — do you know those butterflies that have camouflage on the top part of their wings, but on the underside, they have this gorgeous blue?” doug nods. they'd been fairly common in grunehold. lonnie keeps going. “we're like those butterflies, doug, and the trees we have to blend in to, they're this straight, white, cis, human society that king adam has built, and we have to keep the camoflauge up. because if we don’t fit in, if we aren’t exactly the same as everyone else, the birds will eat us. these people will crucify us. but someday, i know we'll be able to be blue again.”

doug smiles. “i hope so,” he says softly. he’s feeling strangely emotional about this whole thing. lonnie finishes off the plum, and throws the pit into a nearby garbage can with the hand not holding doug's. doug tries not to look impressed, and judging by lonnie’s semi-amused expression, he's failing.

lonnie squeezes his hand again. “we'll be blue someday, doug, and we won't have to pretend to be human, or cis, or anything else — ”

doug cuts her off. “wait, cis? are you not...” he trails off. it feels almost rude to ask. almost too personal. he knows he and lonnie are friends, but he doesn’t quite feel comfortable asking this. he takes another bite of his oatmeal instead. it's cold now, and he immediately regrets taking a bite. 

lonnie blinks. there's a long pause. “...no?” she says quietly. “more like genderfluid. sometimes more a girl, sometimes more a boy, sometimes neither, sometimes both.”

“okay,” doug says, and then asks, “what pronouns should i use?”

lonnie looks down, looking almost ashamed, and doug blinks in confusion. there’s no reason she should be ashamed. “she and her,” she says, and there’s another pause, before she adds, “i'm not exactly planning on coming out,” she almost-whispers. she looks up, meeting doug’s gaze, and then adds softly, “it's not my time to be blue yet.”

“i understand,” doug says. he squeezes her hand, and she squeezes back, and suddenly, doug doesn't quite feel so alone.


End file.
